People here may find some comfort and inspiration from an author by the name of Jamie Winship, especially regarding "true identity" (I realise that may be a trigger-jargon term but I don't know what else to call it). I can recommend his book, Living Fearless.
Do you feel powerless?
Are you living with regrets?
Do you feel like a failure?
Are you stuck in unhealthy patterns?
Too many people feel like everything depends on them and don’t feel good enough to handle it all. Years of painful life experiences have caused them to develop beliefs about themselves that are not true – a false identity. We help people discover their true identity so they can experience a life of joy, peace and freedom.
After listening to a few podcasts featuring this author, who has a real-world testimony to back up what he preaches, I'm now more convinced than ever that submitting to RFI ideology did more damage than I realised, particularly with regards to identity.
In hindsight, I knew my identity (i.e. recognised God's calling) at an early age but through decades of relentless indoctrination progressively gave it away for the sake of obeying twisted RFI doctrines based on biblical principles such as "laying down your life" and "being hidden in Christ". Ironically, I thought I was so righteous for ultimately burying my talent. (And we all know how that parable ended.)
The thief comes to steal and destroy, and I got robbed blind because the thief disguised himself as the Master of the house. I'm thankful that God is more persistent and relentless with His love and mercy than the thief is with his lies and destruction. The thief, through the RFI, may have stolen my youth but God can restore - and is restoring - the years that those locusts ate.
In the meantime, I will practice listening to God's still, small voice until the lies and distractions become glaringly obvious and completely intolerable. By His blood and my testimony I will overcome.
