Rejection

[Dexter]

Nature And Causes Of Rejection
by Derek Prince:

https://www.derekprince.com/radio/586#top-2

I started listening to this series when it dawned on me that I suffered a lot of rejection within the churches of the RFI archipelago.

It may be helpful to anyone who has been shunned or excommunicated from RFI churches and family.

[Dexter]

Rejection Rebellion Control Stronghold
by Joseph Beckham

https://youtu.be/zFCL-FC9I70?si=sfiIkKJG9XeyQX5A

In this presentation, author Joseph Beckham discusses insights about the effects of illegitimate or excessive control over a person, leading to rejection and rebellion.

“Who is talking in your head, controlling you?”

[guest]

‭Isaiah 53:3 ESV‬
[3] He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces he was despised, and we esteemed him not.

https://bible.com/bible/59/isa.53.3.ESV

[guest]

Thanks for the post Dexter,
You are not alone on the rejection in the RFI movement. I think it is set up that way. The nature of the beast. It’s so unfair and not how life should be. So many things are so wrong with XCF.
Hope we all heal.
From G101

[Helen Pomery]

Good morning G101

I have been deeply affected by rejection also. Like so many have experienced, the pain is deep and long lasting. While we hope and believe for reconciliation … decades can pass without any resolution.

I’m still learning how to process pain. I’m not an expert. However, a couple of things I have experienced:

The Lord never rejects us and that is forever a comfort and consolation.

Secondly, healing is a long journey. We take steps of faith, and grace brings us comfort, if not answers or resolution.


There’s a richness and deeply touching love that God bestows to those who are shunned and rejected. It doesn’t take away the pain. It doesn’t mean we don’t have stuff to process.


I’m not pretending I have found the answer to rejection, but I absolutely know that Jesus understands our situation more than any human at any time.


So what does God’s grace and comfort mean to me?

It means everything. I can face every day without my family because of His love. I can face every tomorrow, because of His mercy and comfort. I can live in faith for reconciliation and never lose hope because of His help and guidance.

Oh, what a wonderful God we serve!!!

[Stargazer]

Thank you Helen for sharing your painful story. It is just unthinkable what you have been through. I pray that the Lord continues to wrap His loving arms around you and continues to heal the hurt.
I too, experience close family cutting off. The hurt, pain and confusion by their CF shunning processes, never seems to fade. I always ask the question, why did this happen? When will it stop? Can we have justice? Looking to the Lord is all we can do. Pray for the trapped people inside to have the scales wiped from their eyes.

[guest]

Why did this happen?
When will it stop?
Can we have justice?


I can’t answer these questions but this I know:

No guilt in life, no fear in death
This is the power of Christ in me
From life's first cry to final breath
Jesus commands my destiny
No power of hell, no scheme of man
Can ever pluck me from His hand
Till He returns or calls me home
Here in the power of Christ I'll stand

[Thanomere84]

I'm sad to say this, but people like Aunty Helen and myself, we face a grim reality: that some family who we love dearly... may likely never come close to us ever again.

If anything, it's this that makes me feel impossible to ever forgive Vic "The Vicious Hall" Hall, for all he's done. I once had family. Extended family, who were loving, who were welcoming, who supported me no matter what.

It was these family members who kept my sanity when I went through a period of intense bullying in my school life, from 1997 to 1998.

Never in my worst nightmares would I ever have imagined that these family members, in 2015, would make my life a living hell by their cruelty and coldness to me, instigated by vile and hate-filled judgments pronounced on me by Vic and his then-executioner and right-hand man David Falk. The shunning nearly made me want to take my life.

Because it's beyond excruciating to see people you spent so much of your life with, go from friends, to enemies, just because of the words of one man. One evil, Satanic, ungracious and vindictive man.

[Helen Pomery]

Dear friend,

Please be assured that you are not alone in your grief.

I personally know of many who are praying for God’s mercy over this entire tragedy. Many are praying for those inside the fellowship to find a way of escape and to know the love of Jesus Christ as never before.

Many are praying for us the survivors - those who have been chosen to suffer such a loss. Please never feel forsaken or alone.

I will be praying for you over this weekend Thanomere84. Be encouraged and strengthened in your faith. God holds the whole world in His hands.

[BreakFree]

I have been thinking about this thread for a couple of days. I appreciate there are a number who draw strength from a renewed faith and there are others who do not. While I have found a spiritual home in our local Anglican church I would like to add some thoughts from my mental health recovery separate from any religion.

I have participated in a number of group therapy for people with various mental health conditions. These include.
ACT - Acceptance and Commitment Therapy
DBT - Dialectical Behaviour Therapy
RO DBT - Radically Open Dialectical Behaviour Therapy

I want to briefly focus on ACT. In summary ACT is about recognising thoughts and feelings as just thoughts and feelings. It talks about a choice point which is things that draw us toward living by our values or things that keep us stuck.
I have kept coming back to the Choice point. Every day I have to make a choice. I feel deep pain from the rejection of my biological family and once friends/community but, I can not let that pain stop me living my life. After leaving CF I became firstly a husband then a father. My choice ever day is to connect with my wife and child and love and support them. Even at my lowest points now I have to choose to live only in the present focusing on what is in front of me, not what was or what could have been.
I still battle the sadness of my family rejecting me but I see it only as thought/feeling for a moment. When I think of them I acknowledge the thought but do not engage with it. By that I mean I take a few moments to think of family but then refocus myself onto the present and think of my new family and the life we have together.
I am not saying this is easy by any stretch, all mental health skills take practice but learning how to just acknowledge things as they arise and then refocusing.
to make it clearer I like to think of it as a train. Your thoughts are the train that comes into the station. Some trains don't stop at the station, some trains do. Just because a train stop though doesn't mean you have to get on.

BF