I recently attended a stock standard church wedding with the typical readings from Psalm 145, 1 Corinthians 12 & 13, Matthew 22. AS I sat and just listened to the scripture I could not help but think:
* how uncomplicated this was
* what would life be like for members of CF if they lived like the scriptures talk about.
The passage from 1 Corinthians really hit home LOVE IS... I challenge anyone from Brisbane, Melbourne, Sydney or whatever other Christian Fellowship to please explain how is cutting someone off LOVE. It certainly doesn't represent any Christlike behavior I have read in the gospels. I dare any leader to publicly talk about and post online how their definition of LOVE matches that of Jesus. Let Vic's word pass the Christian pub test with an unbiased 2 witnesses (John 8:17)
Thankfully I was not married under the 7 blessings that Vic invented (I have heard that this has been done away with and a new marriage service created but can not confirm) But I do remember attending a few of them, there was nothing personal for the couple in that wedding. Its quite sad actually. However a stark difference I noticed was this in the wedding I attended there was not this underlying tone that the husband was the authoritarian figure of the house that the wife was completely in submission to. This way of thinking leads to domestic violence.
While I am not interested in having a debate about the different theological understandings of the headship model that the way it is taught and understood in CF is a fast lane for abuse. My personal opinion is that husband and wife are equal in the relationship. I respect my wife and we make decisions about our family together. Like in any other relationship we have strengths and weakness so we navigate life by listening and learning from each other. I believe this to actually be more inline with the way of Jesus. It is often over looked how important the women were in both Jesus' and the early church ministry.
7 Blessing Wedding
Re: 7 Blessing Wedding
I regret that after attending about 20 weddings in one calendar year, I lost all interest in marriage. Deep down I desired it of course, but the incessant, repetitive, and comprehensively impersonal nature of the xCF Order Of Service finally quenched my inner flame. (I think there's a high chance I was on the elders' "unmarriageable" list anyway (unconfirmed) so i probably needn't have held my breath regardless of my personal desires.)But I do remember attending a few of them, there was nothing personal for the couple in that wedding.
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Re: 7 Blessing Wedding
Just a quick correction if I may: the "tone" you speak of was most definitely not "underlying".However a stark difference I noticed was this in the wedding I attended there was not this underlying tone that the husband was the authoritarian figure of the house that the wife was completely in submission to. This way of thinking leads to domestic violence.
I would consider myself probably leaning complementarian with regards to the "headship" thing (I too, do not wish to debate) but the submission act in those weddings was way over the top, and very awkwardly so.
I used to sit at these weddings thinking, "There's no way I could do this to a woman I loved", which no doubt solidified my relational singularity and cemented my (probable) top billing on the elders' Unmarriageable Young Adults of the Year* list.
*Who remembers the UnYAY awards? You wouldn't because I just made it up, but I reckon that could've been a thing. Maybe they'll institute it once the Flying Monkeys report this comment to the Department of Submission, Courtship And Marriages (SCAM).
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