Remembering Broken Families

Hope4
Posts: 78
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2023 1:13 pm
Contact:

Re: Remembering Broken Families

Post by Hope4 »

“In times of hurt, I turn to prayer,
To ease the pain that I can’t bear,
For thoughtless words can pierce the heart,
And tear our world and souls apart”
Hope4
Posts: 78
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2023 1:13 pm
Contact:

Re: Remembering Broken Families

Post by Hope4 »

For those who are shunning their family or friends, here’s a short summary of the despair they feel.


‘The shame of being shunned can be like a heavy cloak that covers everything, leaving a person feeling trapped and unable to move on. It can be a weight that crushes, making it difficult to see any hope or possibility for the future. The longing for acceptance and connection can feel like a dream that is out of reach, leaving one feeling hopeless and alone.’
Faith Hopegood
Posts: 135
Joined: Mon May 29, 2017 9:41 am
Contact:

Re: Remembering Broken Families

Post by Faith Hopegood »

Hello Hope4,
Thank for you for your posts over the last months. I really appreciate them.
Jamie
Thanomere84
Posts: 65
Joined: Sun May 28, 2017 11:00 pm
Contact:

Re: Remembering Broken Families

Post by Thanomere84 »

Being shunned is a scar that will never truly heal. Especially when you encounter those who are shunning you. The furtive glances. The torn looks on their faces as they debate inside whether they want to greet you warmly or just walk past you coldly, pretending that you do not exist. And if you greet them first, the false cordiality they display when they greet you back in return, but you know they feel uncomfortable because they know they're talking to one of BCF/RFI's "undesirables".

When the encounter happens, the pain doesn't sink in immediately. But it's when the encounter has ended and you're on your merry way, perhaps having your dinner, resting at home, or hanging out with other, more sincere friends, then the thoughts hit: "They were once my closest friends". "The memories... I still remember them all... what we did together, where we went together". "How could they do this to me? Don't they know me for who I am? I thought they knew me better...". "Am I lacking that much in credibility, where one man's word could cause them to attempt to ignore my existence for this entire lifetime?". And you feel your heart sinking.

I wish I could say I'll let go of those memories one day. I wish I could say one day I'll smile, look back on these memories and shrug them off cheerily, saying I've moved on. But in the deepest thoughts of my mind and the deepest recesses of my heart, I know for a fact - my mind and heart and soul alike, will be eternally scarred from the butchery I went through at Vic 'the Vicious Hall' Hall's hands on 2nd March 2015... and the subsequent butcheries inflicted upon me by David Falk, my former church's leaders and my former church's members - many of whom were my family members.
guest
Posts: 166
Joined: Fri Jun 23, 2017 6:44 am

Re: Remembering Broken Families

Post by guest »

Hi Thanomere,

I appreciate your comments and can tell that you've been hurt very deeply.

I wish I could say I feel your pain, and I do to a degree, but I actually found it difficult to build close friendships in the first place at any of the churches I attended.

Maybe that's a blessing in disguise, but I sometimes still regret not making the most of the good friendships I had. As they say, you don't know what you've got til it's gone.

Unfortunately I fell into the trap of "laying it down" to the degree that I deliberately limited my friendships just in case I started enjoying them too much. Weird huh. There's probably more to it than that but the "laying it down" doctrine contributed to a lot of destruction and atrophy in basically every facet of my life.

If I can encourage you, please don't say that you'll be eternally scarred. Please take heart with scriptures like Revelation 21:4:

"He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away."

I don't what that will look like, but let's look optimistically forward to a time when all our scars are healed. I need encouraging too as I tend to be pessimistic by nature (or nurture).

🙏💪

Dexter
Hope4
Posts: 78
Joined: Mon Feb 20, 2023 1:13 pm
Contact:

Re: Remembering Broken Families

Post by Hope4 »

I am very appreciative of those who share openly and honestly on this forum. Our ways of coping with pain and rejection vary greatly as we have all been hurt and wounded in very different ways.

What I value is the empathy and compassion we now have for one another and our hurting world. I would never have chosen to walk this walk but I do trust God. He has shown me great mercy and enabled me to see and feel the suffering of others with greater understanding and compassion.

As we name our hurts and our pain before one another we touch others lives. We may never know who is reading this forum but I am convinced there are those who are hurting and confused. If we share our human reactions to abuse and trauma others can identify that they are not alone.

We have survived the ultimate betrayal and wounding because it was done to us in God’s name. This is the grief and utter devastation of spiritual abuse because it mars our precious trust in God’s love and mercy. Thank God we are here to testify to those who are now in bondage and trapped that God finds a way to deliver us from evil!!!!

For each one it will be different but to keep trusting in God…His mercy, His goodness, His faithfulness and His love is an anchor to our soul even in the worst torment.

All I can say is thank you to those who share so honestly. We need no preaching here. We need no pity here. We share because we care.

To those still trapped please know you are NOT forgotten. We love and care for you and we will keep praying. We are here with open arms!!!!!
Post Reply

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 9 guests